Why Your Life & Your Business Depends on You Being Able to Say No
Saying no is one of the most powerful things you can do in life.
Saying no to something that isn’t what you want and that isn’t a good use of your time means that even if nothing else is happening at the time, you are actually saying yes to something that is what you want and that is a good use of your time. Having faith in your business values and direction does pay off far better in the long term.
I used to be the world’s worst at saying yes to jobs that weren’t a good fit with my business. Most importantly, because these jobs weren’t a good fit, I was never going to work with the clients I worked with again. This wasn’t good for either the client or for me, because neither of us built a productive ongoing relationship or gained repeat business out of the situation.
As business owners we are used to constantly managing risk as a result of the fact that the buck always stops with us. As a business owner I have to very carefully scrutinise and assess everything that is offered to me because unwise decisions that I’ve made in the past lost me money, reduced my enthusiasm for my business, rendered me exhausted and wasted a lot of my time. Wasted time also resulted in lost business traction.
Not all business that comes your way is a good thing and not all business that comes your way should be accepted. Accepting everything you’re offered actually depletes you and doesn’t reward you financially either.
Luckily though, saying no is actually easy and can be done very diplomatically. As The Business Oasis states in their awesome article Why Your Business Needs You to Say No, you should always start by buying yourself some time. Now, I’m the sort of person who has never had a problem with giving people a not sure and simply saying, “I’ll get back to you” but I know that not everyone is like me. If you feel more pressure to say yes or no on the spot, all you need to do is tell the prospective client that you’re flat strap with work, but that you’ll get back to them in a couple of days’ time.
This is a good sign in the client’s eyes because it shows that your business is in demand. In addition, there is not a single business opportunity or potential job that must be responded to immediately. Everything that is offered to you can wait at least a couple of days. If the offer can’t wait a couple of days, it’s probably something you should say no to anyway. Something that urgent suggests that the prospective client is extremely poorly organised and is asking you to invite stress into your life by having to move all of it around to accommodate them.
If you decide that the job is not a good fit for you, all you need to do is to thank the prospective client for contacting you, say no diplomatically (you can simply say that your diary is full), and do your best to help the client by giving them the name or names of other businesses that are more aligned with the opportunity they’re offering.
Mis-matches between prospective client offerings and your business can happen on a variety of levels. Sometimes you have to say no because of a mis-match between your values and business goals and the offering at hand. Or sometimes it’s a very simple matter of a mis-match between the product or service being requested and what you actually offer.
Either way, saying no is important because you’re not only saying no for the benefit of yourself and your business, you’re saying no for the benefit of the prospective client who has contacted you. As a small business owner, you have the benefit of having significantly more knowledge than the prospective client. This is because you are the person who has exchanged their own blood, sweat and tears to develop a business and you know exactly what you do and don’t offer. You also know the kinds of clients that you best serve.
Prospective clients often won’t have this knowledge, and their industry knowledge will often be limited as well. In many cases the best thing you can do for them is to refer them to another business who does provide what they’re looking for, and that might also even give them the benefit of an ongoing productive relationship.
It’s important to note that I never feel like l’ve missed out after I say no or worry about the money I didn’t make. This is where the protection of either running your business as a side hustle initially or having a solid business foundation and savings is absolutely essential. It was a beautiful relief when I first realised that I wasn’t giving such offers a second thought after I’d said no to them. In fact if I do give the offer a second thought, I usually just feel immense relief that I hadn’t said yes to it and tried to fit it in on a week that was full to exploding already. I’m done with working at night, feeling exhausted and having to re-schedule more important commitments for jobs that are not a good fit for me.
And I know that money will always come to me because I care about every client I work with and I always far exceed expectations in terms of the value I deliver.
Saying no in these circumstances feels both powerful and responsible.
Interestingly, Marie Forleo has built a super strong business and brand, yet she says no to most of what is offered to her. Neelesh Rangwani’s outstanding LinkedIn article 5 Reasons Every Entrepreneur Should Say ‘No’ More Often has some wonderful tips on prioritising and saying no and includes the below quote that sums it up perfectly:
I love this quote because it encourages me to say no, cut back, refine and and reduce in my life.
Strategies that have helped me say no include listening to my intuition when I’m offered a business opportunity, or anything else in life. If that silent voice inside of me says no, it’s always a no for me. Marie Forleo is also a big fan of trusting your gut or your intuition when you are presented with a business opportunity of any kind. She talks about tuning in to how your body physically reacts to an opportunity, and whether you feel nervous yet excited and energised, versus whether you feel dread or no physical response at all. Not everyone will necessarily feel a physical response, but you should always ask your intuition if you should take up this opportunity and listen to what it says in return.
Another strategy that may help you to say no is to consider what you would and would not say yes to if your business only had a 10 year lifetime (or less) to run? Where would that business need to focus its efforts to get to where it needed to be in that time?
If you’re young, you can pretend that you only have 20 years left of life because somehow your life is going to be cut short 20 years from now (and this is likely to help you focus your life in every way).
Personally, I’m now over 50 years of age and I don’t have time to waste anymore. I need to get the best possible bang for my buck out of my time, and I need to say no when required in order to keep my business values and goals in laser sharp focus.
© Annemaree Jensen